Carpetblogger is become death, destroyer of Cervid worlds

Astute readers will recall that the roe-deer population — whether alive or dead — of my holler in the Ligurian Alps of Italy occupies mental real estate that I used to devote to things like generating income.

Driven back to Nice by the extortionate costs of heating an old stone house in winter in the mountains, I spent February and March sitting under my cheap and efficient heatpump powered splits, plotting against garden invaders and other enemies. This was also the last time I was warm.

One of several great things about living in Europe in The Current Environment is you can order stuff — like electric fence chargers, posts, wire, insulators and voltage testers — straight from China without any tariffs at all. Apparently French/Italians don’t use post setters, so I had to order one of those from China too. How do they set the corner posts? Pound them with their heads?

Mine’s red and sure seems heavier than 12lbs/5.5kgs. Clank! Clank! Clank! The whole valley wonders what misguided activity Vulcan’s weird foreign mistress is up to this time.

How is that I am familiar with post setters? I am the daughter of the Wire Wizard of Kent, Washington. I was pounding t-posts before puberty. I was stronger then probably.

There’s no point in planting anything here before mid-April so I’ve had plenty of time to design the fence architecture. Because I wasn’t sure what I would do if it didn’t work — the most plausible outcome — I delayed hooking it up to the charger. I futzed around with posts and insulators, optimizing the design to keep other non-Cervid garden destroyers out too.

I connected the charger to the car battery (no electricity in my woodshed). FUCK YAH! It turns out electric fences are really pretty easy.

Because my sister lives in Florida, which can only be attributable to all the electric shocks she received as a child, I had to use the tester to see if the fence is zapping.

An Easter miracle of 8000v! Those are young cherry trees wrapped in mesh due to a deer-attack from a few weeks ago in the background. They’re now safely within the perimeter. Also that sign is for me.

To be clear, we’re not just about process around here. Results matter! Not only is the fence working, no deers have come into the garden, which I could not wait to plant, so far this afternoon.

Extra posts are for peas, beans and raspberries.

I embrace that this moment might be the apex of my garden pest-related achievements — deers are the easy ones. I still have to cope with bugs and slugs and who the hell knows what else.